I have been DMing for three groups of my friends. I am tired and want to play for once. I can play at any time. I have three characters I want to play, so if any of them work for your game let me know. Characters I want to play: SKILLET: Human Gunsmith Artificier Sage Skillet has no filter. he will tell the king you're trying to ingratiate yourself to that he's a fucking idiot for not sending armies to take care of whatever problem the party just solved for him. It is a miracle nobody has killed him yet purely out of annoyance. Most people put up with Skillet because despite being an asshole about it, he really is great at what he does. Others just get their faces blasted off before they can touch him. Skillet's goal is simple. Magic item creation is what he does but it takes way too fucking long. He seeks to open a store wherein he can employ magic users to mass infuse items daily. Basically a sweat shop for making magical trinkets. This isn't all so much to make a bunch of money selling rare magical creations, as to then have a paid work staff to infuse his own inventions with magic far faster than he could on his own. Skillet, despite seeming self serving, could be considered by friends to be Neutral Good But Kind Of Annoying. That is to say, if he had friends. PACI: Aasimar Life Domain Cleric Acolyte Paci is the angel that never was. The goddess of life was chosen to make the next holy champion and absent mindedly started making a helpless little cherub like she usually did. Realizing half way through that this thing she was making could barely protect itself she started over. Being that life is basically her whole deal, she decided that rather than undo everything she'd done and start over, she'd just make the cherub a mortal and send her to go play in the mortal realm for a while. She did all of this without telling Paci, who materialized in a field somewhere VERY confused. Paci is a coward, and when there is no opportunity to heal or otherwise help her party, will spend every action in combat either running away or taking the dodge action. She is driven with every fiber of her existence to preserve the goddess' gift of life, and will put herself in danger only to help people, never to harm them, even if fighting would save others. She is most definitely Lawful Good, following the will of her god to a degree that leaves her confused and upset at moral grey areas with no clear heroic thing to do. N'EIYN: Red Dragonborn Battle Master Fighter Folk Hero Son to a caravan guard that died birthing his egg, N'eiyn was left alone and homeless in a remote town he's long since forgotten. At the age of ten the city was attacked by an enormous multi headed beast who slaughtered the entire town guard. With no home or place to hide, he was forced to grab a dull wood cutting axe and defend himself. After hours of brutal combat he stood victorious. This did not however, make the township like him, and he was outcast out of fear that the "savage beast" would turn on them. He now wanders aimlessly, slaughtering beast and bandit alike, not for gold or glory, but because there is no other purpose in his life. He could be considered Lawful Neutral or Neutral Good, depending on the situation. PACI: Human Wizard Sage Paci believes in peace by force. If there are two armies fighting over a moral grey area where neither is clearly in the right, she will politely ask them to cut it out. If they refuse, she will annihilate all of them in one firey death tornado so that peace returns to the land. Paci accomplishes tasks with extreme focus, sometimes driving herself to exhaustion to finish what she started with a grit and determination often described as obsessive. It is difficult to convince her to ever change her mind or falter on a promise kept. If you have her word someone will die, they will die, but she will not abide betrayal. Anyone who tries to use her nature against her to manipulate her will be tortured to death in whatever twisted arcane torment she can muster. Still, she has a very clear sense (in her mind) of right and wrong, and could be considered Chaotic Good. I do not want to play in the following types of games: "It's my first time as a DM" "Our game needs female players" There
are 47 people in this game who play simultaneously (I do not mean
westmarches, I mean games you have to wait 20 minutes for your turn
because apparently the more the merrier in a turn based game) I have 90 house rules about how to use magic Sci-Fi campaigns "I like your character but I want to change every single part of it" This campaign is designed to murder players "We need a DM" Campaigns that are played monthly Paid DMing Evil campaigns Power
tripping DMs that will literally say things like "skipping my side
quests seems to be a main objective of you all. Keep going like that and
see what happens" Webcams required ERP or the DM otherwise inflicting their piss/furry fetish on the players Anime Less than an hour experience with Roll20 Injury rules Mandatory RP quotas Acting like one of our characters is your waifu Massive damage rules Telling us what our characters personalities are Writing our character's dialog "I am a director and you are my actors. We are here to tell MY story" Adding a bunch of homebrew rules without saying anything until after we'd joined the game and/or it's time to play
