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Gonzo and Friends (Session 30 and 31 Recap as Written by Gonzo)

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Entry 30 ------------- Date: ??? (I'm guessing an odd numbered Tuesday, feels that way) Time: Noon-ish  Dear Diary, Today was pretty crazy. We dimension-hopped for the I-dunno-how-many-th time since someone started this whole thing by messing with that teleporter in the pyramid. Can't recall who did that for some reason. Anyways, we're in this weird place and there's three wizards and they play cards and there's these servent women who work for the wizard in charge that day and there's this crazy Jester dude who wouldn't tell me exactly what he is, that's disconcerting. Not to mention that the gang went all Ramsay Bolton on him and now he's fine. At least I'm clean on that front. Get this: The gang attacks this guy because he's got some broad who isn't "evil" under some spell. So what? I'm sure she's done her fair share of dirt just like the rest of us. I wouldn't (and didn't) attack a maybe-god to save her. Didn't matter anyways, after I put the maidens to sleep (they were annoying) and my friends mutilated the Jester we took the maidens keys and their Matron and went to explore the basement. We found a Cockatrice.
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Entry 31 ------------- Date: Wendesday 14, Year One under our Lord Gonzo Time: Night  Dear Diary,   I don't want to go swimming or see a woman taller that six feet ever again. But we'll get to that later. Let's pick up where we left off: We found a cockatrice in the Manor basement. Like three people were instantly statues and I had to save the day for the first time this entry. Boom! Sleeping cockatrice. After one of the clerics un-stonified the statues we found a magic pool that shows you anybody anywhere in any dimension, I was going to look for the Elven King back home and see what his chambers are like, but some dolt and their weak mind made the water real mad.   After they cleaned the puddle up we heard our feathery friend wake up and I had to save the gang again. After I charmed it we got outta there and went exploring for this "watery grave" people have mentioned. We found a hidden hole that led to a tunnel with A LOT of flies in it. And some water. We bailed on that and went to explore the lake and after a day of searching found nothing. Then we went to see this tower, but we bailed on that because we didn't feel like waiting with those maidens. Oh yeah, also the landscape is slowly being consumed by these worm things, we better find a way out soon.  So then we go to the lake and see the fireflies (like actual fire that buzzes around) and somebody almost got cooked up because they were trying to pet them or something, I was looking at the stars so I wasn't paying attention. But then the fireflies became steps? And we went down to the bottom of the lake and met a sorceress and she was cool at first but then Maggie stole her shit and she flipped out! She got like really tall and the water started coming down on us and I thought for sure we were dead, but that Hrissa saved me and everybody else! Except for Lichalia, she just jumped into the water and swam for safety. I can admire that. And then... Then Maggie got blasted.  It's been a long time since I felt that icy chill settle in my stomach and slide down my spine. It's been a long, long time since I cared for someone enough to feel bad when they inevitably get decapitated, or eaten by something, or bodysnatched, whatever way you can think for somebody to eat it at life. I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing that I care, but I do. Maybe it's because she's young and I feel like I have to protect her. Maybe it's just nice to have someone as tall as I am around for once since... But when I saw her charred carcass the tears came and when she woke up they poured harder. Maybe harder than I cried over Covla and the girls... I don't know if that's good or bad. ...I miss you, my love.
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Alright, now it's done.
nice... totally read that in Gonzo's annoying gnome voice too!
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Kevin
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4 XP! I was reading that in Gonzo's voice too. Funny how that works.
Hehe that was totally my intent. Thanks guys.
Yep, the voice is a must.  Can't even start reading without hearing it.  I look forward to more journal entries.
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Kevin
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You forgot raspy-wizard guy. 
Haha great recap from Gonzos perspective! I lol'd numerous times hahaha =D
Kevin the Barbarian said: You forgot raspy-wizard guy.  Gonzo left out the stuff he deemed unimportant or disinteresting.
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Kevin
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Oh now you've made ineffectual-rasping-hooded-emo-guy mad.
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I'm terrified but Gonzo couldn't give a fuck hehe