see: <a href="http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Old_Man_Henderson" rel="nofollow">http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Old_Man_Henderson</a> Well, I don't profess to be anything even approaching the level of hardcore derailment Henderson provided, but I've made a character for Call of Cthulhu who I believe could make most hardcore DM's at least think about ragequitting. i used this sheet as a reference: <a href="http://www.mu-podcast.com/docs/Character_Creation_Process_for_Call_of_Cthulhu_(6th_Edition).pdf" rel="nofollow">http://www.mu-podcast.com/docs/Character_Creation_Process_for_Call_of_Cthulhu_(6th_Edition).pdf</a> His stats, while relatively unimportant compared to his story and quirks, are here: Name: Darius the Ringmaster
Age: 40
Occupation: Juggallo Cult Leader/former military
intelligence officer (marked as missing: presumed dead)
Income: (rolled 8 out of 10) (era-dependant) 1890’s- $5,000; 1920’s-
$7,500; Modern era- $200,000 Str: 17 Con : 13 Pow :
17 App:
9 Dex :
13 Int: 14 Siz:
12 Edu:
16 (14+2 due to 2 additional decades to minimum age)
San: 85 Luck:
85 Idea: 70 Know: 70 DB : +1D4
HP: 13 MP :
17 SP :
85 While the stats are pretty good, i think, it's his background that makes him so simultaneously awful and sublime. I'll give you the short and sweet of his despicable special snowflake qualities. He's a juggalo cultist (scary-clown themed religious nut). More specifically, he's the cult leader and founder. I want to make it clear that his cult doesn't worship anything in the actual mythos, in fact all his beliefs are one hundred percent fake. He was fooled by Xirdneth into believing that his juggalo gods do, in fact, exist, he still has no clue what a "Xirdneth" is, and has never actually interacted with a creature from the mythos. The closest he's actually come is drug (and magic)-induced hallucinations of the "Mirthful Messiahs" coming down to grace him with their unbearable presences for long enough to instruct him to start a cult and make things happen. This occurred once in his youth as a boy, and once in his college days at Cambridge University, where he was studying medicine- after having studied history and psychology in previous years. He never graduated, simply finishing as many classes in as many areas as he could. He took up hypnotism as a hobby at first, but soon learned it could be one of his greatest assets (see: power stat of seventeen). He then moved to the United States, setting up a travelling circus to herald what he believed to be the oncoming "Dark Carnival," a sort of clown-themed apocalypse, and started a massive drug operation to keep it funded. During this time, he studied acrobatics, an early form of krav maga (mostly just street fighting at the time), Eventually, the circus was busted up by the cops, but he was never caught or even identified. He managed to join military intelligence, and worked for some years with prototype weaponry, laying low. Eventually, his identity was traced, and he was forced to flee, though he managed to do so with two valuable assets: A militarized elephant gun, and the schematics for a repeating crossbow complete with high-explosive bunker busting bolts. He underwent facial reconstruction, shaved his head and took to wearing wigs and face paint. He still has juggalo contacts all over from the circus, many of whom he manipulated or hypnotized into joining his cause, and has used them to supply himself with a steady stream of cash, top-quality illicit substances, and massive reserves of his home-brewed "wicked elixer," which he fondly refers to as Faygo, after his late dog. He is debating whether or not to begin marketing the stuff when (insert opening story sequence to campaign here). There's more to him, but I'll leave it at that for now. That's the important bits. Oh, one last thing, I intend to have him avoid san losses by convincing himself that every mythos creature he sees is not only absolutely beautiful, but is also a messenger or servant of the "Mirthful Messiahs," and must be sent back to them via semi-automatic projectile showers and/or high explosive warhead greeting cards so that the Dark Carnival won't start early. So what do y'all think? Think I could pull off a DM Tableflip with this guy? (and yes, I am looking for a group to play him in... I desperately want to test this atrocious mess out)
