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Post Journals / Story / Notes / adventure talk here (August 2017) Fortune's Grasp

So we have been introduced to the "family", what secrets do they hold?
I can always count on you Lex for Fanservice... 
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Hippo Ship Down The druid Shaytara scouted the pond in the form of a fish. She reported back on bodies both alive & bubbling, and rotten ones, chained floating in the depths. Having swimming and Deep Diving NWP skills, Portto the hippo man motored out to the center of the pond. Dak the Tunnelgoblin surfed on my back like a paddleboard, and later clung to my leather bandolier as we descended, diving deep into the pond. Our goal was to free the bubbling brother, to get data about the mother sought for the quest. Before I knew it, Portto was tangled-up in chains 47 meters down, and Dak was nowhere around. The brush of rotten flesh -- I swear it swam towards Portto in the tangled depths that day! Some kind of zombies? We escaped and motored back pronto. Eventually we went back into the pond and tried again, freeing the "" tiefling "" brother. Later in the day I lumbered to the shore and was obliged to rush through a plant gate to a nearby estate, in football formation with Grubar . In the ruins of a fallen Keep, at last dried off, I repacked the horse pistol and fired, missing a Snake-haired lady and a gibbering pile of mouths and eyes. Portto clobbered the Medusa with blunt club of the horse pistol and came face-to-face with her. That's when, they tell me, she made a Statue Of Portto out of me, turned to solid stone, shaped like a space hippo perched in the courtyard of the keep potentially 47 millennia down. I'm only able to type this Report Journal now because I was reformed into the flesh of living Giff in short order, by the victory of my companions, the party of the crew of the Squeeky Weasel . -- Portto The Giff Navigator of upside down maps,  Musketeer of misses,  Deep Diver like an out of control submarine Days Without An Accident: 0  As of Report Journal Star Date August 16
Drucilla sat in the darkness of her tower, she stepled her long slender fingers. Reptillian eyes looking at the figures assembled in the room. "My favorate servants, I have summoned you here  for a reason" She said, looking to each "Of all my servents you are the best, the most deadly. As agents of my will I have a mission for you all" She smiled as she spoke revealing perfectly clean yet wicked fangs. "My husbend has sent a party to end me, they are not weak like the others he has used. I want you to kill them". The six figures shimmered slightly in the darkness, clearly projections of some kind. " my six agents of death,  you will end these people. Then head to the town, burn it to the ground and bring my husbend to me" One of the figures came into view and bowed his head. "I will kill them, I shall hunt them down like animals" His voice was gravely and rasped as he spoke. She smiled and nodded, "So be it Huntsman of souls, go forth to the ruined keep and kill them, bring back my children alive" The figure shimmered and disapeared. "The rest of you, be ready to act. Incase he fails." The six all called out in unison. "Yes my mistress!" The voices where male and female, a mix.
Dak's Inner Monologue - Date (Whatever!) So... After fighting those blood sucking flowers... Those crazy cat-girl twins abducted our Horse-lady. Like always... These jerks wanted to send me through the portal after her... ALONE! I mean come on! I know that I'm a goblin... and we're usually expendable... But I'd like to think my charm & wit makes me an ENDEARING member of our little menagerie. Portto, bless his heart, tried his best to convince me... But I haven't lived this long by being stupid... It did give me the opening to suggest we all go through TOGETHER. So yeah... We all went in and suddenly everything tasted purple... Who'd guess? Now we're in front of this huge lake surrounded by strange rock statues. The cat-girls and Horse-lady were having a gathering... Apparently it was all a mistake. We'll crap a doodle-do! I may not be the sharpest tools, but I do know PORTAL travel is DANGEROUS! Okay... Okay... BACK on topic... So any whoo... Horse-lady explores the lake while we make camp. She explains there are bodies chained underwater. OF course we NOW have to investigate... Since Portto and I are the only ones PROFICIENT enough at swimming; we get the job. I have to give it to the BIG guy... He's definitely more agile in the water than on land. Underwater we go... and then ALL HELL happens... The bodies aren't so dead... their UNDEAD! Two of the deadies chase us back to the surface were a fight starts. Portto bashes one while I shiv the other into zombie soup. We both say F this and hurry back to shore for a breather...
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DM Lex's journal about The Six Agents of Death --- frightening! Sets a tone! Dak's journal by SolidHybrid -- Hilarious goblinese :) Portto is wearing dark sunglasses and keeps scanning the sky, looking towards the sun, for some reason.
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Portto Big Star Bound ★ Last thing I remember, Portto was packing his pistol for his shift on watch. Portto stared too long at a Celestial Event -- same day as a Solar Eclipse on another Earth. Portto passed out. The giff space-hippo musketeer awoke with a start. Hell hounds were baying. The call of The Huntsmen . Was I alone? Looking down at my burned left palm -- Portto sees a Star mark scar tattoo on my left palm (PICTURED). This must've happened during the Celestial Event but I have no memory of how it was burned and cut into my hand. The sound of Gromnar fighting in the breach, and party voices came to my ears. I'm not alone, I'm just yellow. I fired my one shot, missing an oncoming dark hound, and barrelled past another, missing my lineman on the pitch. Ascending the rubble, now at last inspired by the sight of Gromnar the Gladiator holding down the fort, now Portto brought the head butt to bear, smashing a hell hound to bits with oversized hippo jaw power, then pounding another toothy attacker in the muzzle with horse pistol club. They bayed and scattered. I took up arms beside Gromnar and side by side we ended the enemies. In the distance Dak danced around a fresh kill, while Shaytara perched on a roof top. In the end, Gromnar handed me a double-barreled rifle, and the DM handed out XP. Now I can load a total of 3 black powder shots on my person before a battle. As a musketeer, Portto is advancing. The party core is back together, but Portto bears this strange new scar of a Star ★. And the Huntsman got away. -- Journal Report Star Date August 21-22 by Portto the Celestial Watcher, upside down map navigator, Pistol Misfirer, and Star-scarred space man.
The Six , once servants now Masters . The Grounds Keeper , Master of the Hunt, tamer of all beasts. There is no hiding from his hunt, be from shot, pack or trap you will adorn his wall a trophy, The Dancer, She who entertained Kings. A shake of her hips will blind you, her voice in song will force your soul to weep tears. For her anything and everything is all you will ever want to give, she has enticed many a husband or wife to offer their kin in tribute. The Butler, Perfect service until death. He who can open any door or lock, he will lead with a smile and end with a blade, for him dying would only be good manners. The Cook, His meals are legend. An explosion of subtly on the tongue leaves a memory on the soul, His feasts are the most delicious and extravagant, for him you would eat anything, even ones own kin. Perhaps just one more bite? The Governess, Impeccable manners and perfection of poise. She is the teacher and punisher of children. When in her hands any art of magic can be learned, beware for she can reward with gifts of knowledge and learning but also can punish with the Rod. Beware the children.... The Coachman, For him distance is a joke. He who can pilot any craft or vessel, no riding animal is unknown. He could take you to Ravenloft and back in the blink of an eye, his coach is said to be that of legend but beware his temper for he cannot stand to be late. ( You are all hunted now, each enounter you have will determine how they feel about you, beware!)
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Dak's Inner Monologue - Date (Yah yah... Git on wit it!) So... There we were... Having deftly chased off ol Scale-Tits and rescuing the hottie demon chick... We get swarmed by a pack of zombie dogs lead by some major D-bag called: The Grounds Keeper... Seriously... WTF kind of name is that? I mean he could have least called himself: The Packmaster... Err... That won't work! Sounds like the poor sod packs bags all day... OR something... ANYWAYS... So here we are... About to get seriously mauled by some fugly dogs. Naturally... NOT wanting to be eaten & being SMART... I climb the nearest tomb-thingy. From up there the beasts couldn't get me. I tried to get the others (Grommy & Horse-brains) to join me... Ya know... The SAFE thing to do! But ol Grommy is a little on the slow side... YA KNOW what I mean? AND... the dunce goes running off to face off with the whole pack... Horse-brains is no better... fiddling with her gay elfish Nat-Ur-Al magics or something (Hell I don't know!). I'm LIKE...Geebus... Am I the only one with common sense here? Guess so... Doing what I do best... BUST all arrows off in doz ASSES ... Making pin cushions out several doggies. Once I've blown my load... It's KNIFE time... Stab stab stab stab... And another goes down... Then this is the BEST part!!! I jump on-top of one of the bastards and ride it RO-DE-O style across the courtyard!!! EEEFFFF-YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH... You'd never ride a worg, Dak... Oh you're too small...Bla bla bla...  Suck it Gelox! (Wherever you are you SOB).
In regards to Dak missing last session... Yeah... Shiny...
If the journals alone are enough to go by it looks like y'all are having quite the adventure.
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Hey Cat... It has been fun. We always got a space for you if you're available.
Sadly I couldn't make Mondays Tuesdays or Thursdays since I work those days :( But it looks interesting from the journal entries. I like your goblin.
Yeah he's been a lot of fun... Strangely he's the pragmatic one of the whole group.
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Dak's Inner Monologue - Date (Heck if I know!) Yep its official... I hate this freaking forest! I mean... Is it me? OR is everything here UNDEAD! Holy crap... even the rabbits... Gosh damn RABBITS are dead! Little bastards were everywhere... And unlike normal rabbits which are rather tasty... these suckers tried to EAT us. Normally... rotting things moving around is a real BIG sign of DO NOT WANT. But Grommy & this new dorf... Kee-vak... Kor-vak... Hell I can't pronounce dorf  names... Charged right in... Seriously??? AM I like the ONLY person in the party who wants to keep living? I mean... this is becoming a THING...  Any hooo... These two knuckle-heads charge in... They literally... I mean LITERALLY... Start cleaving the hell outa them. Only there's one small problem... See that rabbit hole? Yeah that one... Its FULL of GOSH DAMN bunnies from HELL! But nooo.... Not a single one see it but me! Being the quick thinker that I am... I yelled at Portto (the only reasonable one here) to plug it up. Tha BIG-GUY uses the silver bell (recovered from our encountered with scale tits) to cover the hole... PORTTO my man... Err... Hippo... Umm Giff... Yeah that's it! Now here's where shit gets real... We can't leave all those rabid rabbits down there... Each time Portto tried to get off the bell they tried to escape. So being the BIG thinker... And lover of all things that go BOOM... I suggest we BLAST EM! Like KILL it with FIRE... hehehe... FIRE!!! Portto (see what I'm talking about) takes one of his powder satchel thingies... Lights it up... And tosses it inside the hole... KABLOOWIE!!! Take that you assholes... Goblin is OFF the MENU! Oh then there's the undead mooses followed by that douche-bag "Grounds Keeper" with friends... BUT that's a story for another time...
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Portto Plugged the Rabbit Hole Those rabbits started to tickle Portto's bum as the silver bell vibrated. "I plugged the distress tube up tight." Dak the Tunnel Rat shouted the coordinates for the Rabbit Hole location in the galaxy. Later Portto was obliged to utilize a larger packet full of Black Powder to exterminate the contents under the silver bell. Luckily, no one was injured, save for the smoking infestation of inedible undead rabbit flesh in the dutch oven rabbit hole. Some other new members seem to be joining our crew. There are candidates to the party conveying Journals in the star log. Journal Report star date September 10, 2017 -- Portto the Giff Navigator
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Fess Fess is in Pistol Town, playing music in the taverns and collecting rumors, listening for information among the night people. Class TBA, probably Bard or Priest of a Bardic God. Race is HUMAN. Picture portrait of FESS among some of his interests and hobbies, NWP's, and powers of joy and pursuasion. First Journal of new second PC, named Fess in Fortune's Grasp.  -- GOLD
The four shadows projected into Her sanctum, a few moments passed before one spoke. "Two are gone now, the grounds keeper is dead, as for the other she lives. for now" The voice was well spoken and had a touch of haughty arrogence to it. "More have joined them, I watched them. Two priests of strange disposition" "We have entertained this group for long enough, I ask that you allow me to leave the tower and meet them in the field of bones" The lady nodded her head, her reptillion eyes glinting in the darkness. "I shall gather the shadow society, they will never see me coming" the shadow commented. "I want them alive" The lady stated a touch of irritation in her voice. "I need to turn them, we have open spots for our group now after all" The shadow bowed "As you wish, my Lady". The shadow projection flickered and disapeared.
+300 XP to Lex for DM journal - Foreshadowing PC party's Doom! 
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Rhys's Journal - 18th of Eleint, Present Reckoning 1017 I have joined a band of adventurers on an expedition to Bezzel's Tower. We spent several days traveled across the grasslands an into the outlying forest. For the most part it was uneventful... But as we neared the woods, I was overcome with a sense of dread. This place is haunted... I cannot tell by what... But it is malevolent and powerful. I have also seen signs of the restless dead; proof that foul necromancy is at work. Despite better judgement we have made camp in a nearby cave. My halfling companion has assured me the other half of our group is en route. While he has been honorable and forthright... I cannot shake this feeling that something is not wholly right with him. Maybe its just my nerves...  With everything in place, I completed my prayers to Kelemvor and fell into sleep; listening to the halfling play his flute. I awoke a few hours later expecting to take my turn at watch. Instead, I was greeted by the strangest party of adventurers ever witnessed: A half-orc, hippo-man, goblin, dwarf, and gnome... Before any introductions could be made a loud horn blared from outside the cave! Everyone quickly rushed towards the entrance... We were greeted by a horde of undead; lead by a shadowy figure know simply as the "Huntsman"...
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Dak's Inner Monologue - Date (Wait... what?) I like this cave. It feels like home... Except its free of piles of shit and screaming goblins. Nice and clean. I could get use to this...  Any whoo... So we sent the night in a cave with some weird halfling. Normally I hate those hairy-foot bastards... Well I don't really hate anyone... It's just stuff is ALWAYS trying to either KILL or EAT me. But... This runt seemed okay. He had a big ol roast of pig... So succulent and juicy! Even shared it with us. Portto and I gobbled it up. Even shared some with the rest of the group before preparing for sleep. I like sleeping... Even as much as eating... Could do both all day... IS that possible? Okay... Were where was I? Oh yeah sleep was good n stuff but that douche-bag Huntsman woke us all up. Blaring his gay ass horn all over. I really HATE this jerk... Someone needs to SHIV him in the nuts. Oh it gets better... Sucker brought a whole crap ton of deadies... Big cow-man ones too! Everyone rushes to the cave entrance... Wait?!? Where'd these new guys show-up?!? A sexy gnome (is it possible) and some goth wannabe dude... Huh? Well they haven't tried to EAT or KILL me... So I guess they're okay... RIGHT? So... We're battling and stuff. Things are going alright. Grommy & Rage-dorf got the hole blocked solid. The deadies can't get past them. Suddenly... that RAT BASTARD halfling charms the gnome. She goes all brain dead and smacks me (all sexy like too!). I skipped the tart and go straight to the runt... Stabbed him good too! Made him drop his magic flute... Wait? What the heck... He's a SHE! Really??? Is that possible? Wait... WHO turned out the light? Why can't I see anything?