Session 409 (Mission 4A): War and Wonders War Party: Jannis "The Red" Fisker, Brecht Fighter 9, Physh Vascos, Minotaur, Barbarian, 8, Depraved Lunatic Thorg Sabertooth, Half-Orog, Barbaian 8, Darvius Fenris Nathair, Sidhelien, Druid, level 9, Hats4Cats Jonathan Cashmere, Sidhelien, Bard, 6, Jack B "We were an odd crew... myself, a Minotaur, an Orog, and a prepubescent Sidhelien boy. I had no doubt that the Minotaur and Orog could hold up during battle, but I was concerned about the boy. Not about his abilities, he would be a great support member in the reserves, but of his over exuberance for joining the fighting. Fenris was, as my previous expedition proved, generally hostile towards me. No matter, I've dealt with Sidhelien bigotry before. After a quick briefing to ensure everyone was up to speed on our mission to help defend Mesaraf, we set sail for Ber Mera. As we approached the neck of the Krakennauricht, we saw movement in the water. As we began to prepare for the worst, a small baby kraken (small, meaning the size of a pair of horses) climbed on deck. It did not appear hostile, and eventually began to speak, calling itself "Krizi". Krizi asked Fenris if he had seen Selvie, a Silke I was not familiar with, as she apparently gone missing. After a very brief conversation, Krizi slipped off the side of the ship and back into the dark waters. Upon our safe arrival in Ber Mera, we immediately sought out the Lord Defender to offer our services. As our gift, I offered him a golden bell, and in return I received a golden flute. He explains that the attacks from the Orogs was constant, and he expected another charge on The Wall within the week. Joining a group of fresh reinforcements from Mesaraf's army, we traveled to The Wall, on the border of The Iron Hand Tribes. Along the way, Thorg bet me the drow child would not last past the first wave. Hoping the Sidhelien would stay in the reserves, I agreed to a 50 GP wager. As we prepared ourselves for the upcoming fray, Thorg and Vascos began to argue over whose war paint was better. Each time one claimed superiority, the other would slather on more paint. By the time they were done, both were covered head to toe in various pigments, the only unobstructed part of their bodies being their eyes. True to the Lord Defender's word, we were there but a day before the Orog assault began. The Iron Hand Tribe's forces were a combination of infantry, archers, druids and a multitude of trebuchets. We, on the other hand, primarily had footmen, some archers, and a few spellcasters, mostly priests. Fenris walked among us handing Vascos, Jonathan and Thorg each a pair of goodberries. As he approached me, he simply threw a pair on the ground at my feet, sneering and not breaking his stride as we walked on past. The five of us spread out along the line, embedding ourselves with the various frontline units. As I had feared, Jonathan was right up in the front with everyone else. At that point, I was fairly certain I was going to lose my bet with Thorg. Then, suddenly, to the south of my position a giant avatar of Kirche appeared... joining our forces against the Orog host as it bellowed "Khirdai!". I know not of where it came from, but I suppose having a God's avatar assist you in battle is not such a bad thing. Despite this holy miracle, the Orog forces surged forward as the trebuchets began to rain rocks down upon our heads. With a good amount of distance between us and the enemy forces, myself and a few others focused on taking out the trebuchet crews with our bows. I was making particular good progress against them when I caught the attention of an Orog sharpshooter. His bolt slammed into my thigh as I winced and grunted against the pain. Nocking an arrow, I returned fire and struck him squarely in the chest, killing him. Snapping off the arrow in my leg, I continued my ranged assault on the trebuchets. After several volleys, the charging Orogs were had made it to about 40' from our front line. I loosed one last volley at the trebuchet crews, and then moving as quickly as possible, dropped my bow and cast Shatter in the mass of Orogs charging us, dropping several and disrupting their charge. As the survivors began to engage our forces in melee, I used Azrai's Shadow to invigorate myself, I moved forward hurling my spear at the enemy and recalling it to my hand, and with another burst, cast Shatter once again, decimating one of the Orog squads. Once at the front, I continued to face off against the invaders. As I felled more Orogs with my spear Hunger, one of the Orog leaders noticed and began to charge me. We dueled briefly among the fighting, he scored a pair of glancing hits, but in the end I ran him through his eye socket with Hunger, dropping him on the battlefield. As I finished him off, I noticed a squad of Orogs heading towards our High Priest who for some reason had positioned himself near the front lines. Breaking ranks I charged at the enemy, snarling as I cut them down one by one. I took several hits, but when I was done, the Orogs were slaughtered and the High Priest was saved. With the enemy force's morale wavering, I charged into the middle of the enemy, lashing out with my spear, dropping every one I touched. My companions did likewise, and soon the Orogs were routed. Spying a group of the Orog druids shapeshifting and trying to escape, I ran forward and engaged, slaying them all. I did not escape unscathed, however, and was barely clinging to consciousness when the battle was over. When I returned to the camp, I found Jonathan's frail body impaled by a multitude of arrows as well as a nasty wound on his head that looked like the had caught a piece of stone shrapnel from one of the trebuchet rocks. He was being tended to by the clerics and looked like he would survive. Still, I owed Thorg the money from the bet, though he graciously allowed me to pay just half since the drow child appeared to have a death wish. We spent a week in camp resting and recovering from our wounds. Despite Vascos and I wanting to remain to defend against the next wave, the others decided they had had enough of war and wanted to go on a wandering tour of the northern Mersaraf coastline. I could understand that from the druid and the child, but Thorg? Perhaps fighting his own kind left a bitter taste in his mouth. Regardless, outvoted, we left The Wall and made our way northward. As we trekked through some snowy mountains, we stumbled upon a small ruin. Broken wood, old walls, and rotting shutters jutted up from the snow. Through a missing wall we were able to see a solitary table inside, seemingly untouched by the elements with several items placed on top. We circled the building carefully, looking for any hidden ambushers or potential hazards, finding no footprints or tracks whatsoever. As we stepped inside, a miniature aurora borealis centered on the table came into being. We approached the table cautiously, and as we got closer we noticed the items on the table were a three prong candelabra, a blue necklace with a mythriall snowflake, and some kind of carving in the form of a bear wearing a scarf. The lights and table set up reminded me of some stories I heard associated with the Feywild. I related this to the group, and we postulated that this may be a portal to those lands. Fenris described to me Druidic symbols that may be present and I closely inspected the carving, but found none matching Fenris' descriptions. Thinking that perhaps this was an offering table, I placed the golden flute I received from the Lord Defender, but nothing happened. Fenris then decides to light the candles, and as the third one took the flame, the lights flickered and changed, surrounding all of us in a combination of smoke and light. We could hear faint music, but it was impossible to discern its source. In true barbarian fashion, Vascous leaps forward towards the portal... passes through and slams his head against the table. As Fenris and I collectively shook our heads, he picked up the necklace as I grabbed the carving and my flute. With the items in hand, we were able to pass our hands through the portal to the Feywild. As the others placed their hands on our shoulders, they were able to pass through as well. As we entered the Feywild, we found ourselves in a clearing, the entirety of it occupied by what appeared to be some kind of fair. The entrance was a large structure built and painted to look like a red dragon's head, a snake lazily perched on top. There was a sign, but was written in Sylvan and I could not read it. Finally, a strange looking Gnomish man surrounded by a herd of cats calls out and says that we would need to pay a fee to enter. He refuses to name a price for the fee, so Jonathan gives him a pile of gems to pay for the group. Satisfied, the Gnome stamps each of our hands with an image of a fairy dragon that glows slightly. Someone in the group mutters that it tastes like orange. As the last stamp is applied, the Gnome welcomes us to the "Feywild Festival" and allows us to pass. Immediately upon entering we are accosted by a muscled man bearing his chest named Rafael Antiago, who seems hellbent on selling us... hay. As we attempt to walk past him, he mentions that his "fine hay" is capable of mounts (of sufficient quality) move faster. I have no interest, but Fenris does so he haggles for a bit before finally agreeing on a price. Rafael promises to reserve his purchase so we can pick it up on our way out. As we enter the main fairground, Thorg immediately points to a tent with a sign bearing crossed swords. Thinking it was a weapon shop, he immediately heads for it and the rest of us follow. Inside is a Hanner Sidhe man with particularly long ears and long fangs, no doubt at least part vampire. He immediately starts talking in the frantically fast and babbling manner of the deranged. After asking him to repeat himself several times, he takes us to a contraption at the center of the tent. It was a tall rectangular box made of wood, with the upper half sporting a large window on each side. Various items ranging from rings and baubles to boots and clocks were piled inside. A strange looking claw apparatus was at the top of the box, with a lever on the outside that controlled it. Finally, a chute was located in the back, apparently where you were to drop whatever prize you managed to snag with the claw. He mentioned all of the prizes were magical, including a ring of invisibility! At 100 GP to play, I decided to go first. I managed to snag a small oak box with the words "Ka Ma Ra" etched on top. As I opened the lid, a small impling inside named Flash explained to me that if I point at something and say his name, that he would rapidly produce a small painting of whatever I was pointing at. Johnathan extracts a sandwich bag. The Hanner Sidhe explained that if the owner reaches into the bag, a portal opens to the nearest container that houses a sandwich, allowing for the pilfering of the sandwich and any other items within that container. Vascos score big (so we thought) when he pulled out the Ring of Invisibility, a plain gold piece of jewelry with glowing red elven script that states "Does what it says on the tin." Vascos enthusiastically puts the ring on and... the ring turned invisible. Not Vascos, just the ring. Fenris managed to snag a small portable chair, that once set up, looked rather comfortable, and the Hanner Sidhe claimed it could aid in healing when resting. Thorg, by far, scored the most exciting treasure. A Ring of Turn Undead, a small silver ring with a knucklebone that can rotate within the fitting. According to our host, rotating the knucklebone with cause all undead within 60' to spin around 360 degrees. Several of us immediately smiled and started suggestion fun uses, including one involving Cedrych, the Cohort's resident vampire rogue. We left the tent and started making our way around the fair. Jonathan bout an elemental summoning potion from a pair of Fae Dragons known as Fial and Maire. Next door, I purchased a fennec fox familiar from a small purple dragon named Eckhart (he also had an Owlbear, but it was not for sale, only petting). We stopped briefly at a tinkering/toy display, but the proprietor apparently wanted parts of our bodies as payment for goods. We beat a hasty retreat to the next tent belonging to a vendor who sold masks, items that could transform a person into the form depicted by the mask. Next we found an apple cart. The apples appeared to be regular plain apples, but the vendor stated that these were the most "exclusive and desired" apples anywhere. He was asking 1,000 GP per apple. We moved on. Our next stop was a feat of strength game. A large mallet laid next to a tall tube filled with water and some kind of talking aquatic creature inside. A bellows was attached to the bottom of the tube, and there were three markers on the side at various levels indicating Weakling, Big Boy, and Demigod. The goal, apparently was to strike the bellows with the mallet, and you would be rated by how high the aquatic creature moved up the tube. The minotaur goes first, earning himself the title of Big Boy. Jonathan goes next, and despite being turned into an ape by Fenris to give him an advantage, only manages to score Weakling. The Orog goes next, scoring Big Boy, before calling me up for my turn and handing me the mallet. The handle felt slimy, but I swung anyway. The mallet slipped and I only partially hit the bellows, scoring Weakling. As the others began to laugh, I shook my head and said "Thorg drooled on the handle". Tossing the vendor another silver piece, I wiped the moisture from the shaft and tried again, scoring Demigod. Fenris attempted to by the creature inside the tube, named Gof Gof, but the vendor would not have it, apparently taking great joy in the discomfort of the creature. We next found an outdoor pub hosting a variety of games, and selling very expensive and very strong liquor. Most of us abstain, but once again Jonathan goes charging in and challenges a large insect to a drinking contest. After the 4th round of drinks, the drow passes out. I end up carrying him for the majority of the rest of the day. We passed by several other exhibitions... a griffin petting zoo where we met "Sharky the Shark Person" who, true to his name, had a shark's head. We found a fortune teller who would ask you to state a memory you would like to relive, and then makes it so you experience it as if you were really reliving it again. I chose the day I freed my family from Lord Farber. As I was doing this, some of the other members found Selvie sitting at a table. She appeared to have a strange collar on and was not acting like herself. She claimed that Cordelia had sold her into slavery, but that she was happy. Finally, a giantess of a woman came along, collected her, and they both disappeared into the woods. We then head to the very back of the fair where they were holding an archery contest of sorts. It was an individual challenge. On the field were a trio of goblins, each with an apple on their head. Entry was 10 GP, and if you shot the apple off the goblin's head, you win. Vascos and I participated, with Vascos renting a bow for 1 GP. Both of us easily shot the apples off our target's heads. Our prize was... a refund of the 10 GP entry fee. The Minotaur was at least happy we broke even, until I reminded him that he was still out 1 GP because he rented a bow. The last attraction we saw was run by a minotaur claiming that he could "clone" anyone. There was an amorphous mannequin on one side of the stage, and a platform to stand on to the left. I stepped up and was immediately transported to the other platform, where the vendor informed me that "I had been killed and that I was now but a clone of my original body". Shaking my head at the ridiculousness of the claim, we headed back to the claw contraption one last time where I won a magical golden torc, with three round cut green gems, that could detect the closest magical device, which was always itself. Finally, as the festival wrapped up, was a dancing contest near the bonfire at the center of the fair. We all entered, being given each a Boogie (a frozen goblin) that we could not drop during the contest. Being the least skilled dancer in the group, I was immediately eliminated. Fenris outlasted the rest of our group, but when it came time to dirty dance and he had to lift his partner, he stumbled, dropping his partner squarely on the ground. Eventually, a highly graceful Sidhelien ended up winning the 100 GP prize. With the festival fully explored, we collected Fenris' hay and departed back to Cerilia. Jani "The Red" Fisker Investigator, Cohort Arcanum"
